for mylittlebird.com
THE AIR IN HAVANA is sweet on Thursdays, laundry
day. The scent of fabric softener from sheets flapping on lines strung
across balconies and streets overwhelms the malaise of diesel exhaust
from the candy-colored 1950s cars and various claptrap, pasted-together
vehicles that tootle about the narrow streets. They are, these cars,
just as fantastic as you’ve heard.
If I were to go to Havana
again, instead of pants I’d pack a skirt. Something swinging, colorful,
sparkling with sequins that would swish along in time to the beat of the
streets and catch the sun. Hola! I’d echo the call of the people I met; Trump he loco! which is invariably the second thing said. Si, si, Trump he loco.
They
may not have much, but they do have cable TV, Florida stations
overdubbed in Spanish, so we non-Spanish speakers know something
important is happening, like Chuck Schumer is weeping, but we’re not
sure exactly why. Commercials are untouched, in English, delivered
without irony. Cheerios, Crest smiles, Shield your home, the Slomin
shield. Dial 1-800-alarm me.
This winter, The Prince and I flew to Havana to celebrate a Rather Large Birthday. His.
I’d
been trying for months to pin him down on where he’d like to go, to
wallow in his sorrow at another decade passed with no switchplate in the
upstairs hallway. Oh wait, that’s my wallow.
It was difficult to
hoist him out of this year’s funk; you know, those drumbeats of
approaching death thrum more loudly as the years go galumphing by.
I
dangled Paris, Cuba, Amsterdam, Cuba, the moors of Yorkshire, Cuba,
Quebec. . . . We were at Banana Café, which happens to be a Cuban
restaurant on Capitol Hill, scarfing down carnitas and awash in
margaritas, when he had a Eureka! moment. “Let’s go to Cuba,” he said.
I
suppose it’s clear that I encouraged this. Old cars, older buildings,
the ocean. What better time than now, when Havana is on the verge of
being: a) destroyed by swarms of obese American families in their
matching plaid shorts searching for Starbucks in the land of café
cubano; b) dropped back behind a rusted curtain by our fercocked
administration; or c) closed off to us by their fercocked
administration, because of our fercocked administration. Fercocked being
Yiddish for, I’ll let you guess what it means. And you’re right!
Anyway,
I sighed with relief that a decision had finally been made. Have I
mentioned that this was less than two weeks before his birthday? And
that he did not want to go with a tour, waddling along like obedient
duckies behind a leader, possibly with a whistle and whip? Was it even
possible to do, given the time and travel restrictions and visas and so
on?
Yes.
It took all of a couple of hours, thanks to
Ronald, the Corinthian leather voice on the other end of my phone call
to JetBlue. Don’t bother trying to get information online about
traveling solo to Cuba, you’ll give yourself scurvy. Travel agents, by
the way, are as yet barred from making your arrangements. Just phone
JetBlue, as I found out through a happy accident that’s too convoluted
to bother explaining.
Here’s the drill: You give Ronald your
passport information, and fill out an online form swearing under penalty
of I-know-not-what to your absolutely legitimate reasons for visiting
Cuba. The categories are loose: religious activities (so tempting to
proselytize about something), humanitarian project, support for the
Cuban people. About the only thing it seems you can’t do, so far as the
US Government is concerned, is just go bake on the beach. I checked
“journalist,” which is true, and he a restoration carpenter wanting a
firsthand view of the architecture, which is also true. No one ever
asked us for proof, before, during or after.
Then we flew to Fort
Lauderdale, the launching point for all JetBlue flights Cuba bound. We
picked up a visa at the airport (there’s a guy selling them for $50
approximately four inches from our departure gate) and took off for
Havana. (American Airlines has Havana flights out of Newark and Miami
International. Same deal with the close-at-hand visas.)
If it was
this easy, I tell myself now, I would have booked fewer than nine days
in the city and come up with some excuse for lying on a beach; surely
there’s architecture to be seen, a story to tell, but it seemed so
intimidating, groping along in the dark, fiddling with pages of web
warnings and government-speak. If we were caught out in mild fudging
would we face a firing squad? Guantanamo and waterboarding?
Having
had a fantastic time with Air B&B in Rome last year, I gave it a
try here. If you haven’t booked an Air B&B stay, it can be a great
alternative to a hotel. In Italy we had a completely modern, wonderfully
private one-bedroom apartment in a 2,000-year-old building in
Trastevere, with a delightful terrace with orange trees scenting the
air.
There are some charming apartments and rooms and homes to be
had in Havana—one in particular whispered to me, white curtains
billowing in a breeze from the sea. All of them were booked. We ended up
with a room in Sol’s flat. He’s short and plump at the center, with
stick legs and arms, like a child’s drawing of a man. Since he wears one
each day, he apparently has a wardrobe of oversize sleeveless T-shirts,
huge in the arm holes, to wear with a pair of khaki Banana Republic
Bermuda shorts with a rip in the seat.
Sol speaks little English
despite 12 years in the US, where he may or may not be a citizen, since
we communicated mainly via charades. A chef in Miami, he moved back home
to Havana about a year ago, bringing his sleek leather Roche Bobois
sofa. The rest of his apartment was furnished with a mix of grandma’s
castoffs, plastic flowers and Marilyn Monroe posters. Adding a frisson
of danger were electrical wires hung over the bathtub that had
something to do with hot water. There was not a hanger or a peg for our
clothes, and the air that floated down a shaft into our room held both
mold spores and bird effluvia.
However, Sol made me chicken soup
when I had Fidel’s revenge one day, and bought The Prince a birthday
cake, which was delicious, and sang Happy Birthday in a Broadway-quality
voice. And it was cheap, about $75 a night including a lethal afternoon
cocktail Sol invented called the Osvaldo, after the upstairs neighbor
who once had a very, very bad day. There was also the occasional
breakfast or snack, and it was centrally located, just a block and a
half from the Malecon, Havana’s famed oceanfront promenade. (The ocean,
by the way, is not swimmable in Havana, just dramatic. Sometimes it
leaps the wall and floods the streets).
There are three main
parts to the city. The center, where we were staying, is third-world
residential but with magnificent, jaw-dropping architecture. It looks as
if bombs have gone off. Palm trees grow out of missing roofs, walls are
falling down. People live here, restoring portions of buildings,
carving out a habitable niche. There are little home-based businesses
everywhere: nail salons, barbers, food vendors, operating out of
doorways. The bakery across the street, which made that birthday cake,
operates on the second floor of a row house, which has French doors to a
catwalk balcony that remain open all day. The cakes and rolls are sold
from a tiny stall in the ground-floor entry.
There are carts
loaded with fruits, people riding bikes and holding poles dangling with
loaves of bread for sale, and stores selling strange assortments of not
much: a vacuum cleaner sharing a store window with a black-haired doll
in a ruffled dress and a wrench. Spices are considered a fine house
gift, though why there’s a cumin shortage is anyone’s guess. But the
food everywhere was strikingly mediocre and every meal took forever to
get through—three-hour lunches were normal, most of that waiting to
order and then waiting to pay the bill, severely limiting the time you
have to do anything else.
Along the Malecon, a young woman,
standing in the window of her house, watches her mother (presumably) as
she jounces a well-wrapped infant. My Prince wanders near, gurgling as
he does whenever he sees a baby, and the older woman smilingly hands him
the baby. They coo at each other. We have a photo. Imagine that in
Washington.
The cars were everything you imagined. Most were from
the 1950s, bulbous of fender and huge. Some remodeled, most carefully,
others inventively—Cadillac limos with the tops chopped off, painted
flamingo pink. You can hail them like taxis, though they tend to be
pricy. Far cheaper, and in their way more fun, are the pedicabs.
Everyone expects you to bargain a bit.
Dogs scurry about
self-importantly. They’re amusing to watch, but don’t touch them. They
are not friendly and are inbred to the point where most seem to be the
same medium-size brown dog.
Besides the dog(s), there is no sense
of danger here. This is particularly shocking because almost everyone
is wandering around with wads of cash, credit cards being worse than
iffy. Even when a shop or restaurant says it takes them, an
American card might not go through. A friend suggested we carry $1,500
in cash, which turned out to be far more than sufficient for a nine-day
stay for the two of us, including all meals, the purchase of a Che
Guevara T-shirt, $100 worth of cigars and a couple of bottles of Cuban
rum. In fact, the entire trip, with lodging and airfare, scarcely
topped $2,000.
At the eastern end is the old part of the city,
which for some reason is called Habana, with a “b,” a distinction I
still don’t understand. As you’ll endlessly hear, Hemingway haunted the
cafés in this part of town. El Floridita and La Bodeguita del Medio are
now haunted by tourists. The Capitol building is here, a ringer for
ours, and fortresses with moats, charming squares and cafés, a
smattering of interesting shops and galleries, fortune tellers, and
stilt walkers in ruffled sleeves. This area is slowly undergoing a
terrific revitalization—they’re determined not to turn the city into a
theme park. While still largely a shambles, buildings are being
restored, restaurants and cafés are lively, and some gorgeous old hotels
are being rejuvenated, the sort with central courtyards, dripping with
greenery and open to the sky. The Hotel Florida was particular eye
candy. There were spanking new ones too, very modern and Euro-cool,
though rather expensive. Craving a non-threatening shower, we tried to
skip out on old Sol midway through our stay. One desk clerk quoted $400
per night, adding mournfully, “It’s much cheaper booked on line.”
Good luck with that. Internet and phone service are spotty. It was refreshing to do entirely without.
The
newer part of the city, the main business and financial district, is in
the west. This is where Sinatra, Bogart and Ava Gardner used to hang,
hopping over by boat or plane from Key West, just 100 miles away. The
Hotel Nacional, a replica of The Breakers in Palm Beach, built in 1930,
sits on a point with a fabulous view. It’s a national monument, and
considered (by Cubans) a five-star hotel, but it’s government-operated
and a little dingy and sad, resembling the movie-set lobby of the Grand
Budapest Hotel, when it was in decline. There are a number of museums
worth seeing; the magnificent Napoleon Museum, for one, features
splendid artwork, weapons—and the emperor’s unimaginably tiny armor. But
the 125-acre Colón Cemetery, where Christopher Columbus was once
interred, is sadly neglected, with tombs caved in and vaults ravaged,
and the Quinta de Molina, a small botanic garden, has seen better
days—though it has some engaging caged birds.
I’m tempted to say
if we did this again I’d go for one of the grand hotels in the old city.
However, Sol’s place and those of his neighbors were amazing
experiences, if only in retrospect. We felt, for those days and nights,
like residents of Havana, a feeling that could not be replicated by a
stay in more traditional confines.
But, no matter where you stay
or dine or what you do, keep in mind that this is not a luxury
destination. Don’t bother complaining about hot water, lumpy beds and
slow service. Don’t drink the water either. As a reviewer on Trip
Advisor perfectly summed up a review of one fine old hotel, giving it
four stars: “Before I start, remember this hotel is in Havana. There
are bits falling off the wall in the bedroom and the breakfast is
different, to say the least.”
Four-stars in Havana might not be
what you’re expecting. Roll with it, but do it soon: The
mega-cruise ships are arriving shortly; can a Day’s Inn be far behind?
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